Men and Candles

                Men usually light candles for three reasons, and three reasons only. The “Man’s Holy Trinity Candle” represents one in the same, which means that each of the three candles are all about him. The man’s holy trinity candle follows the “Triple-S Rule:”

• The first candle represents Sex; the biggest and longest candle of them all. Yup—what else is new! This candle is like the eternal flame; It’s always burning.
• The second candle represents Smell; a medium size candle that is used only when they can’t stand the stench of themselves.
• The third candle represents Sickness; the smallest of the candles which is used only when his wife is sick for more than forty eight hours.

                Now, there is only one time of the year when a man will ask a woman to light and blow out his candle: On his birthday, of course. It’s the time of the year when he is looking for a “birthday blow.” Little does a man know, a birthday blow can only be given by the birthday boy himself! So, once again, there is nothing more for us to do but smile and say, “Happy birthday buddy, go blow yourself!”